The day we went to teach class in a primary school

We had all finished our lessons for the day. This is a video of my friend's 6th grade class. She said "just walk into that room with a camera and watch what happens". Now you can watch too.

I had an 8th grade class (the oldest group we could have), and I chose to talk about emotions. As silly as that sounds, it's a concept that they don't really deal with like we do in America. And it's a complicated one, at that. Like I've mentioned before, with the suicide rates going through the roof here and teenage years being an emotional rollercoaster, this seemed like an appropriate time to talk about emotions.

I said to the class "Fanoanoa. Fanoanoa means sad. Can anyone tell me something that makes them sad?" Dead silence. So I moved on. "Fiafia. Fiafia means happy. Can any one tell me something that makes you happy?" Still, dead silence. Frustrated, I moved on and said "ITA. ITA means ANGRY. Can ANYONE tell me ANYTHING that makes you ANGRY??" I waited a little longer this time, and as soon as I saw a girl even flinch, as though we were at an auction, I called on her...

...and she said "I'm angry when my mother beats me". At this point, I realized that the kids definitely understand emotions, and they understand them to a very deep and real level... but they don't use them out loud... or at least they don't use them for petty situations like getting bitten by mosquitos or dogs. I tried to use those things as examples, and the kids just didn't understand. I never witnessed any of the children in my house getting severely beaten, but several of the SIT students said that it happened a lot in their house, and that it was troubling to watch or to hear. All this is going through my head immediately after the girl's response, so finally I snap back into reality and say, "welp, who wants to sing if you're happy and you know it?"

It's not always sunny in Samoa

During my 2nd "drop-off", I jumped on a bus to Solosolo (because that's where I heard the experts go to surf). On my way there, I met a girl around the age of 13 who was heading to Salesa, but told me she'd help me get to where I needed to go-- and told me to follow another girl on the bus named Susannah. We kept talking and were having a great conversation, and when we got to Solosolo she ended up getting off the bus as well. Susannah was so excited and told me to come to talk to her mom, and kept insisting that I stay with them. But then Telesa kept insisting that I keep walking with her to her village.

So, for most SIT programs, "drop-offs" typically last for only a few hours at the most. But in Samoa, the busses only make their last round to Apia around 4, so anyone in the village without a car is stranded (or has to take a taxi-- which is NOT safe to do alone) and will typically just stay with a family. As it was already 3:30 and I hadn't really gotten to see much of Solosolo, I seriously started to consider staying the night out in a village, and not returning to check in with our group until the morning. But then, Telesa pulled me aside and said "you REALLY don't want to stay here in Solosolo!" And then she started speaking Samoan really fast and I didn't understand... but I caught her say "last month" and "the girl" and "her parents" and "that tree" and "in Solosolo!" while she was making gestures of someone getting hung and stabbing their side. "Pule i le ola!" she said over, and over. I had her write it down so that I could ask my AD when I returned. After attempting to decipher her gestures, I assumed that a girl got hung or something, and although I'm an adventurous kinda gal, I really didn't want to risk anything on my first night.

When I returned to meet with the group, I showed our Academic Director the note, and she said that "pule i le ola" literally means "to take control of ones own life"-- meaning suicide. This was my first brush with understanding how Samoans view life and death. In America, individualism reigns, and it's considered a good thing to be self-interested and "take control of your own life". But in Samoa, it seems like that's nearly impossible. The family structures have just seemed so rigid, that no matter what you do, you will always be defined by a larger group.

Suicide rates have been a concern in Samoa, and I was interested in that before I came. In Sia Figiel's Girl in the Moon Circle, she says that suicide in Samoa is about breaking ties with or dis-associating yourself from your family. Usually when someone dies in Samoa, their body is encased in an elaborate monument looking thing in their family's front yard. The family is constantly reminded of this person and openly meditates on them. Those who pule i le ola don't get any of this, and they are said to just be "forgotten"... but this little girl didn't seem to forget.